A phone call with dad - after 12 weeks

So what did we speak about? I couldn't speak about anything too personal as we'd end up going down a route he wouldn't be able to cope with. Much as I love my dad, and much as he loves me, we can't really talk about anything.

He asked about my health - and I said I was getting stronger/better after my exhaustion.

We spoke about dad's knees - he needs new ones

We spoke about my mum - she is deputy head at a coucil - dad said how bad it was, people were out to get her, she had to apply for a job which meant more work but only a thousand more pounds, the post was only for six months, there were ladies bitching (she didn't use that phrase), it was all doom, gloom etc.

He asked me what was new. I told him about a duck with 7 ducklings that had decided to visit my newly drained pond (!). We'd decided to capture the duck with it's ducklings (there's no water near here) and take them down to the local stream/river. "You didn't watch Springwatch then?" he said. "No" says I. "Well - a pike will take the ducklings. And if he doesn't the weasel or foxes will.".

Everyone else's response was - that was sweet, that was thoughtful, that was kind. Not my dad. Mr Pessimistic! Bloomin typical. No wonder I was Mr POSITIVE at home, and up to recently. I had to continually assuage the carpet bombing of pessimism that erupted from my dad.

He thanked me for his birthday present I'd sent through the post, and then told me he'd sent me something through the post too. He was very secretive. I'd heard that one of my other sisters had received some money. So I though - great, I doubt it is money, but maybe it's a nice surprise. It arrived this morning. A DVD on stress, with a list of numbers to call including the Samaritans, Saneline (I kid you not) etc. WHAT?

I know he's trying to reach out, he's worried about me and loves me. However, he just can't relate. Can't talk about anything real. What's a son to do with such a father?